It's been a LONG LONG time!

Well, so much for being good at keeping a pregnancy journal! I guess that's how it goes though, in the beginning there are so many things changing and your so sick that writing (venting) is very helpful. Then you enter into the WONDERFUL second trimester, where you don't have much to complain about and life is good. Now here I am in my third trimester and the need to write (vent) has come back again :)

Time has felt like it's been flying by! Until June, and then EVERYBODY had their baby. I felt like I still had forever to go while everyone else was enjoying their little bundles of joy. Now it's back to flying by! I feel like I have SO much to do and so little time to do it in. In reality I have hardly anything to do and if the baby came tomorrow I'd be more than ready, but I can't shake the overwhelming feeling that I'm unprepared. I KNOW that I am totally nesting right now, because I have been cleaning (at least thinking about cleaning :)) and organizing like a crazy person. I have this great urge to get rid of everything and have everything totally organized, which is totally not like me at all. I'm sure Brian will be sad when I revert back to my unorganized messy self. Like today, I gutted Ayden's closet (which has been our storage closet for the last 2 years) and got rid of a ton of stuff. I mean really, if we haven't looked at it for 2 year's how much can we need it!? It felt so good to let go and unclutter my life!

As for how I have been feeling, well, it's my third trimester. My back has been just KILLING me. I can't sleep at all anymore and I'm not my.... nicest self when I'm sleep deprived. The no sleep thing has been the hardest because I KNOW that isn't gonna get any better for a LONG time. It's a little bit cruel that pregnant women can't sleep BEFORE the baby come's.

Well, hopefully I'll be a little bit better the next 10 weeks about journaling than I have been so far!

Morning Sickness

Wow, morning sickness this time around has been so fickle! Yesterday, I was SO sick! I had a headache and I couldn't eat anything all day. After around the 6th or 7th time I threw up I stopped counting, but it was ALOT! All I could do all day was lay in the fetal position near the toilet. Poor Ayden, I know he senses when I'm not feeling well because he goes into good boy mode. He was wonderful yesterday, so sweet watching his movies all day and occasionally coming in to rub my back or give me kisses! What a sweetheart I have! Later last night I decided I would venture out to Walmart to pick up some supplies (popsicles, crackers, ginerale ale) and to try to find SOMETHING that I could eat. Brian went with me (mainly to pick up a blu-ray player :)) and when we got to Walmart I threw up in the parking lot! This is what I remember about being pregnant with Ayden, throwing up anywhere and everywhere! But I seemed to have been spared so far with this one (apart from yesterday!). My biggest problem this time has been sheer exhaustion. From the moment I wake, no matter how much sleep I got, I'm exhausted! It is just crazy how different these pregnancy's have been! And it will be really interesting to see how different things are throughout!

Rough Night

Yesterday I was so tired! From the time I woke up I was completely exhausted. I don't remember being this tired before. Around 7:45 I announce that I'm going to bed! I actually make it to bed around 8:30. I don't remember the last time I have gone to bed before 10, but I was gone, fast! Brian came in around 3:30 (trying to keep with his schedule of staying up all night) and woke me up, which is not very hard to do. I woke up to pain! My head was throbbing and I was sick to my stomach. After a few hours of being miserable, I was finally able to throw up which seemed to give me enough relief to fall back asleep. Which lasted about an hour before Ayden woke up super early this morning. I felt exactly the same as last night. Have I mentioned I HATE tylenol, it's completely useless! I was able to throw up eventually again this morning, and even had a little back rub throughout it (thanks Ayden). I have a feeling it will be a long day!

Different

This time around my morning sickness is SO different from last time. With Ayden I threw up a few times everyday until about 20 weeks. This time I have the same nauseous feeling all the time, but I can't throw up! It's awful! I feel so incredibly sick to my stomach all day, sometimes sitting by the toilet just praying that I can throw up! I'd almost say it's even worse this way. First of all, I think your body gets a sense of relief for awhile once you do it, and second I don't think my dear husband has any clue how sick I really am! It's easy for him to be more understanding when he sees me puke a few times a day. But when it's me just constantly complaining of a stomach ache all the time with no action :), I feel like he thinks I'm over-reacting or something.

One thing I would like to know is how mom's can change diapers with morning sickness!? Every poopy diaper I change I gag! It is the worst! That, along with grocery shopping. I went to the grocery store the other day and almost threw up in my purse! Going past the all ready cooked chicken's by the deli I wanted to die! And they have this weird olive bar type thing there, I'm not sure what's in there but it STINKS so bad!

I am also exhausted! Another thing my dear husband doesn't seem to understand. Exhaustion has hit me hard this time, and I constantly feel like I am battling to keep my eye's open! I can't get anything done, even thinking of a chore makes me tired! This is really hard because I feel so useless. I feel like I let Brian down every time he get's home from working all night and our house is still a mess.

It sure is different this time, because I have other people who depend on me. It was so nice to be sick last time and just have to worry about myself. Not to have to worry about Ayden, and meals, and cleaning, and running errands. If I was sick last time I would just curl up in bed, take a nap, and tell Brian to heat himself up a hot pocket for dinner :)

Sick

I am sick :(

That is all.

Quitting Caffeine

I don't remember what quiting drinking caffeine was like when I got pregnant with Ayden, but I'm pretty sure that if it was this bad I would remember. I drink ALOT of caffeine (in the form of diet dr. pepper :))! I get bad headaches and migraines and pretty much live on caffeine and ibuprofen. Pretty much the whole time we were trying to conceive I was dreading the day I'd have to give them up. I think after this whole experience I won't go back to drinking soda again. As soon as we found out I was pregnant I stopped drinking soda and taking ibuprofen. Immediatly afterwards I had an intense headache that lasted about 5 day's straight. Today is the first day that the headache has become tolerable and boy am I grateful for that! Luckily, whatever morning sickness I had has gone away for the time being so I haven't had to deal with that too! The good thing out of all of this is that I really don't have any craving for soda anymore, in fact soda doesn't sound good at all anymore. I have been drinking raspberry lemonade crystal lite and it is SO yummy! So after all of this I think I'm going to be quitting soda for good! No more caffeine! I think that it's a very good thing that we had to try for so long to get pregnant, because despite four day headaches I am thrilled to be pregnant!

We are pregnant!!!

So, since my last pregnancy I was AWFUL at keeping any kind of records or journals throughout my pregnancy I decided to do a special blog for this one. I think blogging is a wonderful way to keep track of your life and I hadn't stepped into the blogging world until I had one week left with Ayden! Even in that one week I love going back and seeing what I was thinking and how I was feeling and laughing at myself for being so impatient! I am excited to keep a better record of my pregnancy and even vow to post lots of pics (something I desperately wish I had more of last time)! So this blog is completely meant for journal purposes and will probably write LOTS of dumb stuff, dates, and gross pregnancy symptoms (just a warning)!

First I guess I'll start off by talking about trying to conceive. OH BOY am I glad that is over! We have been trying for 9 months and it has been a long, stressful, heart-breaking, and chip-crushing nine months! It's funny how your body plays little mind games with you every month to make you completely convinced that your pregnant only to be devastated! When I finally took the test on Saturday the 16 and saw the 2 lines instead of one, I was in complete shock. I have taken a million tests throughout the TTC period and was just used to my little one lined tests. That morning, while trying to conceal my cheesy grin I had plastered on my face all day, I tried to come up with some awesome way to tell Brian. I made it a few hours but couldn't hold it in any longer and just told him. I'm not sure he really believed me at first, but after showing him the evidence he was excited! Unfortunately I decided to tell him right as he was going to bed (Brian has been working night's and sleeping day's) so I had all day to be excited alone. Ayden heard a lot about the baby that day, I mean I had to talk to SOMEONE about it!

I don't have a doctor's appointment scheduled until Feb. 24th, which seems like a long time to not want to see me for. I think I might go insane before then! I am four weeks along as of right now and am starting to feel some morning sickness coming on already! I am wishing and hoping that it won't be as bad as last time! It will be interesting the difference between working and not working and what a difference having a 2 year old will make!

Anyways, I hope to update often and am beyond thrilled that thing is FINALLY happening! YAY!